November 2008.

That is the month we purchased our first little house. A few days after we signed the papers we started demolition. Today it's still a work in progress, and it kind of got to me this week. I'm sick of renovating. 3 1/2 years is a long time for a "project" of sorts. A project you can leave in a workshop or a garage is one thing; leave it, forget about it, come back when you want... It's different when it's your home. I'm constantly dusting, always sweeping the grit, vacuuming the dust and dirt. There seems to be a lot of little things unfinished, areas I would rather wear shoes in, things I hate looking at now because it's a constant reminder we are living in chaos. No matter how much I clean or de-clutter, I'm never satisfied, I never feel at ease about my surroundings.

I'm really good at ignoring it by keeping my eyes on the TV or a book, but that doesn't last forever, I'm always forced back into reality: we still have a lot of work to do.

My husband works hard. Father and Father-in-law? Amazing, both in their own right. So many other family members and friends and hired professionals have had a hand in turning this little dump into a strong, warm, safe, inviting home. Our home. And though it may seem like I'm complaining, I know this is what we chose. I know we are incredibly lucky. I know this won't last forever. But it's all we know right now, and it's getting to me. I'm sick of being that "half-finished house" on our street. Like a lot of things in life, it's hard to see the finish line. I know it's going to be a beautiful home, it already is. I just want it to be a finished beautiful home.

February?? Already!?

2012 is flying by. Why is that? When I was younger, years seemed like AGES of time. Now they fly by, the next one faster than the last. I know a lot happened last year, but it's like it all happened last week. I want to slow down. I did slow down... for 7 days... I think Time actually slowed down. And it was lovely.

Cuba was am-A-zing, and relaxing and warm. Everything we needed. (Well not "needed", but whatever :) It was hard to get back into the swing of things, but I do like home too.

One of my Opa's said something like, "Once you get that Florida sand between your toes, you're hooked". I could say the same for Cuba. Can't wait to go back there. (Or somewhere like it!)

Food Headache...

Or I guess it's a no-food headache.

I don't know why I get a headache when I don't eat enough. I will get the normal stomach growls and hunger feeling, then it's like it all disappears from my gut and goes to my head.

I've been cutting down on my food intake this week, well today is the first day I guess. Anyway, I cut all sugar from my diet, and I think that is what is causing me this head pain. Could I really have withdrawal from chocolate?! It has been a constant food group this holiday season...

I told one of my co-workers that she should watch out for me on Wednesday. It is day three of the cleanse and the worst day of 5. It's like your body starts to hate on you for the lack of yummy treats and wheaty things. And you start to wonder "Why? Why am I doing this to myself?" And the only time you actually feel "good" is when you're sleeping because your brain is turned off. And even when you try to ignore it, the cravings turn into anger. You know you can't have that juice, or that piece of fruit and the frustration of it starts building up inside. And sounds start to annoy you, and people start getting on your nerves, then you snap at your husband for saying something totally normal!

"I want to do this". 24 hours ago it seemed like a sensible thing. Now, I'm questioning myself. Do I really need to lose a few pounds? I'm not fat by any means. I wanted to feel healthier. Or did I just want to shed my unwanted love handles before Cuba... I guess both.

I think I'm starting to understand that I have the weakest will in the world. I complain about my pudge a lot, and when I finally kickstart a change I can't deal with the sacrifice; food. It's not that I'm obsessed with it, but I love, love, love certain things. Bread and chocolate, and apple juice, all of which I can't have for five days. Four days. I think I know I'll feel better about myself when this is all over with, but I'm not happy right now.

But don't worry dad, I did get my heart rate up today, and Neko's happier for it.

I just want. And I don't need. Four days. Me and my gut are frustrated.

morning post

I've noticed that my way of thinking in the morning is vastly different than at night. I really do like blogging later in the day... I don't know why really. Maybe I need to warm up, or let my day sink in... whatever.

Anyway, it's been a while! The Christmas/New year holiday was great. It was fun and oh so satisfying to be with the ones I love most in the world, and eat and drink and be very merry :) If I could just live in a perpetual state of holiday season for the rest of my life, it would be like heaven for me. And it doesn't seem to be ending for me! Just a couple weeks ago we booked an All Inclusive trip to Santa Maria, Cub

a (well, the island of Santa Maria) and I am SO excited! There is a part of me that feels guilty for doing all inclusive. It's just a little excessive, and maybe I am being selfish. But I guess I'm paying for it. It will be fu-UN though. Here is the list of people coming so far: Justin and Nicole, Melodie, Annika, Leia, Corrie, Daryl, Bec, Tom, Nick and I, and Cam P. It's gonna be a part-ay!!

Anyway, I have to start thinking of what to take. I don't usually overpack, but I'm so excited this time!! Nicholas will keep me in check. We're leaving in 13 days! Anyone else want to come? You're welcome t

o!

Cuba Trip of 2012! Yay!

Baby OPA

My older sister Pam and brother in law Don had their first child one week ago today. He is a healthy boy, born at 6:51am Nov 30, 7lbs 6oz, 20 inches long and his name is Oscar Peter Amero :)

As I'm sitting at the computer and thinking back a week ago to this minute, I was in a very, very different setting, with emotional highs and lows, tired and hungry and worrying. Right now I'm warm and comfy and looking forward to lounging around tonight. All this week I had flashbacks of, well a lot of gross stuff, and beautiful stuff. Watching my sister give birth was one of the most interesting and beautiful things I think I've ever seen, although, the images my mind captured that day would tell you otherwise...

I was liking the idea of having a baby, thinking that this year would be the year Nicholas and I would try for one. Well, after this experience I think I might put that on hold... Haha. But seriously, it's probably going to take me longer to recover from this than Pam. But that's a whole other blog topic. For now there are enough babies going around to satisfy my cravings, and I'm sure I'll be ready when the right time comes.

So to Pam and Don: Congratulations on a beautiful boy. He came into this world in a dramatic entrance (got that from his dad...) And he's already the joy of all our lives. He's even got Nicholas swooning over him :) I can't wait to see him again, and again, and again.....

ps. I'm going to let Pam post pictures of her son first. Only seems fair.

I Will Try Again

I read some of my old blogs recently and when I finished reminiscing, I realized it has been a year and a half since my last post. I thought that was sad until I realized that nothing has really changed since that blog... We are still working on our house, Neko is still maturing, I'm still not quite sure if I'll take my music to the next step... and I'm STILL working at that cafe.

But, even though it is getting colder outside, and we are only just heading into long winter months, I still feel a new life of blogging ahead of me. And I ambeing a little dramatic; a lot did happen in the last year. A marriage, a pregnancy, a CD release.... There is and will be lots to blog about! And I have missed my "Ode's To..." So in honour of my new found blogging and the Christmas season approaching (and the special day that it is) here is:

An Ode To Black Friday

Oh, shops, full of stuff

full of people running wild

Did you forget what you were looking for

when you stepped on that child?

Or was that flat screen TV the best of all deals?

I only hope you can afford all your coming Christmas meals.

It sickens me to see all this stuff we think we need

and that a "lady" will fight

and pepper spray will proceed

hair pulling and screaming just to get that "special" thing

I don't want any part of it

No more gadgets that go 'bing'!

I only hope that this Christmas we'll remember what we should

People we love, food that is shared, laughing with friends

All things good.

Oh, black friday,

we know you mean well

but you come straight from he-- Oops!

Happy Christmas Shopping everyone!!

IT'S ABOUT TIME!!

So, what is new?

Well....

1. The house reno's are going well, doing a lot of outside work right now getting our yard into shape and using the great weather wisely! We hope to do siding in the next couple of months and get a lawn growing. It's coming along! ( I would post pictures, but it doens't really look that great right now...)

2. Neko (the dog) is growing up, slowly... I accidentally hit her with our car, but she is fine. I didn't hit her that hard... It just scared the crap out of me : ( I feel really guilty!

3. I got a job at the Grace Cafe downtown. It's good, and fast-paced. It's only part time, so I continue to work with Don and work on the house in my spare time. I will be in the studio next month to record some vocals for Don's next album! It's gonna be his best yet!

4. Hm... Don't really have much else going on... I'm looking foward to the summer, hopefully getting away with Nick and relaxing for a bit, but we'll see!

5. I'm sorry this isn't a funny/interesing post! More to come... hopefully!

More Pictures than Words...

Well, the last week has been a blast. Saw Becky after a month without her, performed at an awards show with Donald, where he WON!! Best Male Artist of the Year! Yes!

We hung out with some good friends and had some really good times.

(I know my words have surpassed the number of pictures I have, but whatever.)

(Also, I can't organize pictures in this blogger thing, so you're gonna get a bit of my week Momento style... haha)

So, the last thing we did: Played a great show in one of the oldest standing churches in Toronto with the Great Wooden Trio and Mike Janzen. Good night.

My new boots. So cool. So cheap. Nick told me not to buy any more shoes for the remainder of the trip. Fair enough...

Oh yeah... I was trying to be a rockstar before the show... Successful?

Us hanging out in our dressing room! We had our own showers and toilets! And we were only two doors down from Buffy Saint-Marie.

This is what I wore to the awards... there is actually a picture of my all dressed up on the red carpet a link on Pam's blog. Go check it out!

okay, so the first day we got there we went shopping at a mall, and since I had been up at 5 am that morning, I was much in need of a coffee. So we stopped at this cute little place!!

This was on our way to our hotel/my reunion with Becky picture! lol

So, this is on the plane from Calgary to Toronto. Just thought it was a cool picture... I love clouds.

And last, but actually first, waiting for my flight to leave in Calgary. (For those of you who don't know, I was in Saskatoon for a week previous to this, but WestJet has close to NO direct flights to Saskatoon from Winnipeg, so every time in or out of Saskatoon, I had to stop in Calgary first, which is only 1 hour and a 1/2 out of the way. Yeesh! So silly. Calgary was not in my travel plans for this trip, but I ended up going there twice! Crazy....)

These are just a few pictures of my week... And My sisters are soon to join Becky and myself to go down to NEW YORK in just a few days!! I will probably have to make a video of all those pictures... but Christmas might pose as a distraction, so no rush on that!

Happy first Day of December everyone!! Go and get your Christmas Tree!!!

cheers

Saskatoon, the city of bridges...

Or so my father tells me...

Funny story: Kelsey grew up in Moose Jaw, SK , and as far as I know there is no river there. So, she was telling me when, as children they would come to Saskatoon to visit family, and she and her younger twin brother and sister were actually frightened of driving over bridges! haha.. This is funny to me because I grew up in Winnipeg with the Red River and there are plenty of bridges.

That was a GOOD story.

Here are the things we did this week!!

Had A LOTA lattes. haha

Here are some now!


Went to Mendel Art Gallery to see a John Henderson exhibition.

There was also a movie of short stories that we watched...

Here is the movie!

Kelsey trying to be Me. and I was not happy about it. Obviously.

Us cooking together. Mulligatawny Soup. Yum.

Two fish out of water, and weird ones at that.

We tried to be rockstars, but I was wearing sweat pants.

We were being silly.

That's just a little of what we did... we had fun!!!

Thanks for tuning in!!

caio!

Saskatoon!!

So, I'm here in saskatoon with KELSEY!! MY SUPER BFF!

We are having fun, buying second hand clothing eating REALLy good food, and seeing a lot of cool things. I also went to work with her yesterday, and it was fun! She's a life guard and I like being around someone who could save my life when in need. Yes.

AND we are going to go to an art gallery tomorrow and hang out with great people this week! Our throats are raw from talking so much, and we haven't even skimmed the surface!! I love my friend Kelsey, I'm so happy to be here.

So, that is Saskatoon so far, and I'm really enjoying it! It's kind of like a week long sleep over/slumber party! But I am also looking forward to TO and NY coming up.

So lots of love to you all! And I miss you all!!

cheers